Memorium

I've thought about my Mom every day since she passed. She was such a caring, understanding, and loving person and it was a blessing to have her bring me into this world. To me our relationship was very special. I never had any major fights with her (there was those terrible teenage years but I fought with everyone then). She was there for me 100% of the time. She made me who I am today and she was so proud of both my sister and I. She was the person I went to when life was getting me down or I needed a confidant. She was the first person I called with news, good or bad. She truly was my best friend.

For those of you who may be regular readers of my blog, you know that my family is extremely close. My parents, sister Kerry, and I truly were one unit. Ever since I can remember, these three people were my life. Kerry and I both went away to college but returned to the house after school. Before I met Shannon, I would work in Connecticut during the week and then head up to Massachusetts for the weekend. Even as four adults we still loved to spend time together. We vacationed on Cape Cod every summer. Mom also planned family vacations around the country. In the last few years we visited New Hampshire, Arizona, Nevada, Texas, and San Diego together.

Some would find this strange; all that time home with my parents. But it always felt right to me. Back when I was in college, my parents started birding at Broad Meadow Brook, a local sanctuary. I always thought that it was peculiar that they got up early every weekend to look at birds. The "ah-hah" moment for me came when we were out on the Cape. We were walking out on the boardwalk at Wellfleet Bay when we were buzzed by a female Northern Harrier. I was amazed to watch this beautiful bird hunt. It swooped and dove.. I don't remember if it ever caught anything. But, I was hooked.

In the years that followed, Mom, Dad, Kerry and I spent lots of our free time out in nature. While we did our share of traveling, a lot of the memorable times were here in New England. So many great memories:

• Watching the snow fall in the desert near San Diego.


• MassAudubon Bird-a-thons whether they be hot or torrential rain.


• Volunteering at Boo Meadow Brook


• Looking for Black Racers at West Hill Dam.


• Monitoring the Harris' Checkerspots at BMB.


• Driving through Anza Borrego at dusk praying for an Ocelot.


• Driving around Central Mass on Mark Lynch's waterfowl surveys.


• 4th of July butterfly counts.


• Admiring the Grand Canyon from the South Rim.


• Big Night at Pergatory Chasm.

I think that I could go on forever. I got addicted to being outside and enjoying life with these people who I loved unconditionally. We met so many fantastic people through this hobby (or should I say way of life). These were true friends, people who cared about you. I can't fully explain to you how this has enriched my life.

So, I'm not embarrassed to say that I spent so much time with my family. Given how things turned out, I feel blessed to have had this time together. And the memories that just may mean the most to me might be the times that she and I were alone together. Hiking at Delaney. Trudging through a field covered in sweat looking for butterflies. Early mornings birding on the Cape. Trips to Plum Island.

Its been one month and one day and I miss her so much. I want to call her up and see how she is doing. I want to get out with her and experience a sunny spring day. I want to tell her that Shannon and I are engaged. I want to hold her in my arms just one more time. But its not to be.